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Monday, April 4, 2011

Don't let the door hit ya on the way out!

Ok, this entry might be long. Just as I walk from one room to the other I have found five things that I will look forward to being gone with the kids someday. I have spent a year and half talking about how wonderful my kids are, how much I have enjoyed being a stay at home mom, etc etc etc. But this entry is going to begin a string of blogs dedicated to those little annoyances a mom has to put up with day in and day out. Here we go...

1. Kids fighting. I am pretty sure I don't need to elaborate on this one. Even those of you without kids know exactly what I am talking about. My kids do it every minute of everyday....

2. Dirty dishes. Dirty dishes in the sink, bathroom, bedrooms, under the couch, in the yard and so on. More to come on that later.

3. Shoes...I have already blogged on that one. Still my nemesis.

4. Wrappers of all kinds stuffed into the cushions of the couch. I have to blog on this one just because as a kiddo I was completely guilty of this one.

5. Dirty clothes. This one is ten times worse than the dishes. When I am older and my kids are gone I will hire someone to do my laundry. I know it would be more useful now, but I am too broke right now.

6. Attitude. The sharp nastiness you get when you say "have you done your chores" "stop bugging your sister" "No we are not going to walmart to buy you pencils right this very minute" and of course the all time classic "I can't do that today because I don't have the money". You can imagine the responses I get on those. That will be a fun blog.

7. Spongebob, House of Anubis, Curious George, Phineas and Ferb, Wipeout, Americas Funniest Home Videos and so many other kids programing choices. I can't wait until I am the old fuddy duddy that doesn't know who the latest Disney star is.

8. Pee in, on, around, and under the toilet, in the toy bins and yes...even all over the floor in the laundry room right in front of the clean laundry bins. And yes...I have found pee in every one of those places...plus more! Another fun blog!

9. Empty boxes in the fridge and pantry. Why in the world do the kids put the boxes away empty? My own disappointment is clear when I reach for the ding-dong box and there's nothing in it. With this I might have to add that I rarely get some of the yummy treats I buy...my hands and mouth aren't fast enough. And let me tell ya...they are pretty fast when it comes to sugar...but my kids are faster...

10. Carpool. I never imagined way back when that I would spend so much time and money on this venture. When I was nursing that first, and even the second and third children I never thought "I can't wait to spend hours of my week and hundreds of dollars on gas to drive my kids to and from free public schooling every week."

11. Before I had children I fondly imagined my fridge littered with darling drawings the kids did for me in school and primary. I just never imagined the artwork would hardly be on paper, but more on the walls, the underside of the kitchen table, the bathroom mirrors, the brick on the outside of the house and even on their clothes. I must add here that not all artwork is done with crayons, pencils and markers. Those are the more pleasant things to wipe off walls...

12. Trash. Seriously, how much trash can one family accumulate? I will add to this one the D.I. runs (nearly weekly)...it's like my mom used to say..."You kill one fly and three come to his funeral". I think the same applies to clothes...I throw out one bag and somehow there are three to replace it.

13. Bedtime. My favorite time of day, my kids least favorite time of day....and all the fighting that comes with it. I have previously blogged about this time of day, but it's time for an update.

14. The ice cream truck. What parent really loves that? I hear that noise and my heart speeds up, I start to sweat and I run to turn the tv all the way up to try to mask the sound. It never works.

15. Kids homework. I specify kids because a lot of parents are going back to school to further their education. That kind of homework is ok. But the kids homework? I have to say that every time I have to help with math, research a report, draw a stick figure and label his body parts or make a science project I sit and stew with the words "I already went to school...I am done with all this!" going through my head. I will admit it's worse with nine kids....so much homework!!!

16. The all mighty tattle-tale. I really hate hearing "Moooooommmm.....Joe just ...." it gets so dang old. I need to come up with some anti tattle-tale tactics. Geez people...learn to problem solve already!

17. The sleepover. I have much to say on this matter. There's friend sleepovers, cousin sleepovers and then there's the failed sleepovers. I think I am going to go on a march on Washington to ban sleepovers forever!

18. "Well, Savanah has one and if she has one why can't I have one?" You know...this would not be a problem if we lived in a third world country and my kids had nothing! Maybe a move is in the cards for us....

19. No dang batteries in the house...and the items that they go in seem to disappear constantly too. Flashlights are the worst. Heaven forbid we have an earthquake in the middle of the night. What a joke that would be. I can hear Jon now..."I know I put a flashlight right here in my closet and now it's GONE! Those dang kids!"

20. Socks. This will be a shorter blog, but anyone who has ever come to my home has seen the infamous "sock bin". If laundry is my nemesis than the socks that do come out of the dryer and aren't lost are the fires burning in the Hell that I live...

Well, I am sure I can think of more...but for now this is good. We can have some fun with those starting tomorrow! Bring it on folks...this is gonna create some smiles and make us all laugh. Maybe out of empathy...and maybe out of "boy am I glad I am not you!" thing. Either way this is going to be good therapy for me.

1 comment:

  1. LOL. Love it, love it, love it! Keep 'em coming!

    ReplyDelete