Unconditional

Are we born with it? That ability to love someone without hesitation, without judgment, without end...that ability to love someone who hurt us so badly that we cried ourselves to sleep and yet the next day we found ourselves wanting to be with that person. I think we are born with it.

That kind of love knows no bounds. It has no beginning and no end. I have learned so much about love in my lifetime. I have a family, I have children and of course my cute hubby. I have added more love to that over the years. Added more family, added more people and yet it never seems to find a limit. My mom and dad have always been here. They are one of the constants in my life. I thank the Lord for them...they have always been here for me and always will be. I have Jon now, and my nine kids. Now that they are here it's as if they have always been here. I can't imagine my life without them and I don't even like to try.

But there are others. People that have come and gone in my life that I love dearly. I have friends, people that touched me for a moment, but forever. Polly and her family are this to me. We are not related in blood, but in heart they are there forever. I want to be mad at her or her kids at times, but I have found that I just love em so darn much that it never lasts. Yesterday as I was at her home eating and laughing, her two oldest daughters came into the room and were goofing off and being silly. I look up, literally, to these kids now. They are both taller than me and they both have become such beautiful women. I feel very protective of them at times. I want to wrap my arms around them and love them and knock em up side the head at the same time. They mean the world to me. I am so glad they are in my life.

As I have lived though I have added even more. Some that I didn't expect. Years ago when they found me, my life would change forever. It did and continues to. My sisters, my biological ones, came into my life 14 years ago, and ever since then it's been something that has grown. These last couple of years I have come to appreciate them so much for who they are. They are amazing, they love me (I don't always know why), and I have found that I am protective of them like I am my kids. That's the amazing thing about love..it truly does grow. Each and everyday it becomes more. Now, you do have to work at it, you do have to let it in, and give it back. Then it can become something larger than life itself. When Lori, Lisa and Tracy came into my life they brought Susie with them. No more needs to be said on that one. We all know what she means to me.

Here we are just a few days away from Fathers Day. My dad is my dad. He is quiet and conservative, but he is mine. I love him for the man he is, for the dad that he has always been for me. I have a new emotion this year too though. While in Vegas this last time I got to see a picture of my biological dad. When I saw it, I saw myself in him. Only in looks, but there I was, there he was. I am forty and I am just getting a glimpse of him for the first time. From what I hear he is not someone that even has interest in me, or any of his other children for that matter...but that doesn't change the fact that he is my father. I looked at that picture and even at a table with eight other people at it I was completely alone. The noises around me faded away, and for one brief moment it was just the two of us. He and I. I started to cry, although I don't know why. One more piece to the puzzle. One more answer to an endless array of questions. I hope you have a good fathers day...whoever you are. I think I might just love you, although I don't know why.

Unconditional love knows no bounds. I know it, I believe it and I try to live it.